In the last year, I've written a lot. Like a butt ton.
I did my best to write them, even though most of the time, there was barely any time at all. It's a really busy life... and to be honest, it's understandable why a lot of people don't do this at all.
It makes sense why others might not want to talk about life. Or their feelings. Or anything deep to anyone. Because it takes time and you're putting yourself out there. This isn't required. No one told me to write. I just do it. And quite frankly it's exhausting and my time could've been used to something more productive. But I value writing about it. It's a space for me to think. Too often we make the stupidest mistakes because we just forget, or we didn't think about an action enough, or maybe we're just afraid to look deeper than what's in front of us. And I get that. But at least this way, it gives me peace. I don't have any regrets anymore and it feels nice.
Or you know you could just shove it down and be on your merry way. But where's the fun in that? What's the point in having emotions if you don't take the time to just feel.
However, writing down these thoughts for the world to see presents a different problem. This is probably the third or fourth time I've written about this topic, but I do it because it keeps coming up. I have to keep the audience in mind. Yeah I typically do this for myself, but even then, every time I write I ask myself if I should follow my heart or the heart that's reading mine. Blogging for random people to read presents a different feeling of vulnerability. Because in a way, your audience understands you deeper than any other close friends.
That's not true though. That last sentence.
Reading my blog. Reading my letters. Reading my speeches. Reading my emails. Do you really think you can know a person just by doing that?
I've written so much this past year... A few weeks ago one of my friends said this quote.
"I've read your blog. I'm pretty sure I know you."
Well lemme tell you something [audience]... You think you know me? Until you meet me I promise you...
You have no idea.