The Longer Ones

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

What do I look for?

A few days ago I talked to an old friend and she asked me what do I look for in a girl? She wasn't interested in me or anything, she was simply curious because she's afraid that she's stuck in the friendzone.

Personally I kinda like the friendzone sometimes. It makes for some quality late-night talks.

WAIT A MINUTE. HOLD ON.... I'm going on a two year lent... why am I even talking about this?
Oh wait... I remember... my buddy o'friend o'pal Elizabeth told me to write about love.

Anyhoo let's keep going. I kept talking to my old friend and to be honest I can't remember the entire conversation. All I fully remember was finishing my dialogue and seeing a tear roll down her face. She gave me a hug and told me, "that was beautiful."

Now it's about three weeks later and I think I finally remember what I said (or at least something close to what I said).

Disclaimer: This list is a prototype dream girl list, and to be honest I highly doubt this will ever happen in my life. If it does happen though... HOLY GEE DANG!?

1. Likes/loves me, or simply appreciates my presence. This one is probably the most important. To at least have the ability to tolerate me in my best AND worse time. This requirement isn't just for being a lover, it's also for just being a friend. I want to be able to be myself... and as strange as I may be sometimes, it would be great if they can handle my weirdness about half the time haha.

2. Cute/looks okay. As perfect as I try to be, I'm still human. And a part of my human self is slightly superficial. In the past I have liked and/or dated the following: European mixed (blonde, brunette, and redhead), Latina, Indian, Asian. Basically... I don't care too much about race.

3. Can hold a conversation. One of my favorite activities are taking long walks/drives. It's a great way to know myself, the people I'm with, and the place I'm in. However, if there's no conversation going on at all, then it's just awkward silence. Of course there's reasonable silences, but I don't want to make it awkward. I want to be able to know her and just have a good quality talk.

4. Intelligent/clever/witty. All three, or a combination of the three. In my life I value education and organization as the recipe to being a successful person. Without it, a person's life becomes dependent and can fall apart easily. Strive to keep learning or to at least do something more with the day.... and it's kinda hard to keep up sometimes but it's okay. With these new information, it's important to be open-minded yet skeptical of the truth, and though it's hard, it can also be quite fun to learn. I want to be able to talk about a complex or strange topic and not slowing down for definitions or other unnecessary considerations.

5. Sacrifice. This attribute is specifically from my parents. Both of my parents are engineers. Did they always dream of becoming engineers? Most likely not. But as they matured it's the career path that they realized will help them the most in life. Though I also value happiness and being happy, I personally value women who are willing to sacrifice some of their goals for what needs to be done or for what is more productive. Not the one who choose the easy way out, but the woman who intentionally chooses the harder path because it will help her become stronger. To all the female accountants. To all the female engineers. To all the female doctors and lawyers and other professionals. To all those who sacrificed what they want for what they need, I salute you.

6. Self-worth and confidence. Even if this person doesn't satisfy everything else above, just being happy for who you are is one of the hardest morals to learn in life. Having the confidence to being yourself and being you is brilliant. You're a character. You're special. You're the only you in the world, so be yourself and be proud.

7. Kindness, Respect, and Charity. This one doesn't need any explanation.

I told her all of this or at least a paraphrased version of this and a tear came down. She asked if I ever dated or had a crush on any girl who had these qualities. I answered yes... to almost all of them. I'm skipping the rest of this conversation. We both said our goodbyes and I went to bed.

Before you comment or anything like that, I'm writing this at 2:01AM... please forgive my grammar and writing. Also these are not in any order of importance.

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