The Longer Ones

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

CH 71 Demon Sheep

Okay. guys it's fetching Christmas Eve. If you're reading my email, you're doing something really really wrong. I am nothing but a bobo, delete this email and move on with your life. I am insignificant in the whirlwinds of life and will do little to nothing to affect time and history. Forget about me, Today ought to be about Jesus Christ or your family or better yet both.

So I challenge you to read
3 Nephi 11
Matt 1-3
Ether 12
Alma 37
Alma 32
Alma 39-42
1 Nephi 3
1 Nephi 27
Hel 15
the entire New testament
recent talks from general conference
Fetch even a Christmas Hallmark movie or something
or literally anything and everything about Jesus because He is awesome and can give you more than I will ever give in my eternities of being. So stop reading about my life and start reading about His.

If I still can't convince you then here's a demented story about a sheep and my hatred of cats in the Philippines.

So I hate cats. I just hate them. Like divine irrational hatred. Like I really hate cats. in the Philippines, I hate cats. I believe they will all burn like Judas Iscariot and if God is merciful unto them then they will receive the Telestial kingdom. But anyways Elder Bjornn is unlike me, he loves cats.

it used to be whenever Elder Lewis accidentally kicks a cat I laughed, but times have changed. Now it's Elder Bjornn and he's a cat lover.

I am disgusted.

So far in our companionship he has saved 2 cats from starving inside a plastic bag left in the woods. But it's okay because in the time I most needed it, God has granted me my wish.

The second time Elder Bjornn saved a cat, this frail starving cat left the bowels of this plastic bag unto freedom. and as we stared at this cat we decided to follow it to see where it would lead us. and it led us to 3 medium sized sheep.

now these sheep were somewhat different they were skinnier than they ought to be and their eyes are different. it was a different orientation.... like it was vertical instead. idk how to explain it but it was.

we kept looking at this cat come closer to the sheep. and as it slowly inched closer we heard 2 things.

"bahhhhhhhh"
***CRUNCH***

These carnivorous sheep ate the cat that Elder Bjornn saved. And ripped it apart....

"Oh God no!!" -Elder Bjornn
"Haha that's so funny" -Elder Villanueva

I don't think that that cat died because of me, but in that moment, I'd like to think that it was.

Sorry but I hate cats. I should apologize for this story but I don't because like I said before, you should delete this and read about Jesus Christ instead

Maligayang Pasko at Manigong Bagong Taon!    (Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year)

-Elder Villanueva
Urdaneta Philippines Mission
Quezon City North Philippines Mission

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