The Longer Ones

Friday, February 17, 2017

I'm free?

It's kinda strange looking back at what you've already done. At times it doesn't even seem like I'm looking at myself. Like I keep on changing or evolving until I'm someone completely different. I just hope I don't turn into someone I hate.

A few weeks ago I met a person who reminded me of it all. Every sacrifice I let go. Everything I once loved. Every little thing I lost to become me. I looked into her azure eyes and I saw it all.

It was hopeful and sad. She seemed foolish and naive, and it reminded me of me. She gave me her time and I fell. We walked and talked and every conversation reminded me of a small boy finding his home. She was kind to me.

I'm not sure how to describe it but she contained a selfless desire to care and know others. She looks at every person with the confident, almost blindly optimistic view that they are amazing.

And I let her go.

We eventually walked in front of a waterfall and I had to tell her what was bothering my mind. I needed to go. It wasn't right for me to remember the things I let go. That for me to progress, I had to learn from my past, and keep moving forward.

She still talks to me at times, but never with that intense optimism. Now whenever I see her I'm reminded that this is the cost of being free.

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